Swedish Beginners opens with one of the funniest first scenes you will ever see in your life, featuring host Angelica Ardel, festooned in full Swiss Miss regalia and giving you rather harsh directions in badly dubbed broken English on how to whip out your dick and cum all over her face. The constant commentary she provides between each scene will surely not only make you laugh incredibly hard, but will also completely eradicate any hint of sexual energy the rest of the feature might create.

Not that there's a whole lot of that going on in Swedish Beginners, which, aside from the hilarity of the host, is really quite boring sexually and would have to catch you in just the right mood for you to find any of it even remotely erotic.

At a bloated 135 minutes, there will be, at the very least, a whole lot of fast-forwarding going on while watching Swedish Beginners, and you might feel more inclined to play it as a comedy for friends than you would to actually use it as stroke material.