Most inflatable lovedolls are a rip-off, mainly good for use as bachelor party gags and funny pool toys. Not so this Tera Patrick Doll. The box says "Ultimate" and Tera lives up to the hype. She's a fully functional work of inflatable art, form the perfectly crafted head (with supple, Futurotic lips and a vibrator function) to the single-mold latex body casting and seamless construction. It comes with a bullet vibe that you can use to liven-up any of Tera's three inputs, as well as a maintenance kit and a foot-operated air-pump.

Even if you don't have sex with her, the Tera doll is a godsend. My Tera doll models ball gags and lingerie for AVN's resident art dude Jay Moyes, allows me a free-pass in L.A.'s carpool lanes and works as my personal assistant, holding pens in her mouth and generally keeping me company in my little cubicle. Not a bad career for a piece of rubber. Unless your customers are musicians in washed-up metal bands, they'll probably never get the chance to sleep with the real Tera Patrick, so point 'em to this dolly. It's the next best thing.