Pardon my French, but this pair of Goth floggers is fucking incredible––and here’s why: (1) The handle and neck are separated by swivel attachments that link to a solid chrome ring, allowing for fancy acrobatics without causing over-exertion; (2) the red and black suede tails are the perfect length and weight to pack a heavy yet relatively painless punch; (3) they’re well-balanced; (4) the black plastic handles are molded with a faux-crocodile pattern and are capped with blazing red skulls that grin back at you as you lash your victim into a state of exquisite bliss; and (6) they’re cool. ’Nuff said.