Note that this multi-function baby is called Mary Mermaid, not Merry Mermaid. Could it be because the "body" of this steplessly adjustable rotating pearl vibe more resembles a stylized Madonna with a fish tail than it does Darryl Hannah in Splash? Perhaps, but take our word for it when we say that this holy trinity of rotating pearls, undulating head, and clit-buzzing tail, all swathed in a pure silicone skin, would bring even the most devout Mother Superior to her knees-with peals of orgasmic exaltation. Now just imaging what it will do for your more secular customers. Four AA batteries and two easy-to-use twist and shake controls are all they'll need to induce their own deeply religious experience. And the bright, informative packaging is a revelation unto itself. Hallelujah!