Dear Santa:
Sometimes when I'm really tired, I'd like a vibrator for my girlfriend that I can just slip in her pussy and leave there, adjusting the various speeds for her via remote control (the same way I control my stereo, TV, and VCR). I've been a good boy this year, and I think I deserve it.
If your elves aren't up to the task, you might give the folks at California Exotic Novelties a call.