Awwww, sounds like someone needs a Monologue...

"It's one of the rare political issues where Democrats and Republicans agree"

'My, my, someone fetch a priest/You can't say no to the beauty and the beast.'—David Bowie

'The smell of burning leather as we hold each other tight/As our rivets rub together flashing sparks into the night/At this moment of surrender, darling, if you really care/Don't touch me there!'—The Tubes

Also becomes advice columnist for 'Nylon'

"Don't stop to watch/Your Life slip away/Forget tomorrow/And do it today"—from 'Don't Say No' by Can

Cites poor sex education as real culprit

Exxxotica needs an answer from the judge this week for convention to take place in May

Only in Foley!