Purportedly based on"a true story that happened in Malibu, California in 1998" this all-girl vid tries to capitalize on the"real dyk" market with butch/femme genderfuck,"forced feminization" and other ideas that sound terrific - the only problem is that the reality ca't live up to the awesome billing.

For starters,"butc" does not mean tucking your hair under a baseball cap and wearing a pair of me's underwear. Not that the concept is't exciting, but once the hat comes off and the long hair spills down and we see those flawlessly polished fingernails... uh... yeah. The three performers here may not be the ultimate in high-femme, but they sure ai't butches - no matter how much heat the're packi' in their boxer briefs.

The vid consists of two overlong sex scenes. The sex itself is merely okay; it might fool men, if not dykes (for whom the vid appears to be marketed towards; hence the rating). Plenty of strap-ons and mini-vibes and dildos, plus vocalizations such as"Fuck yeah" and"Go to town" (Is that a hint? Are all the real butches actually lurking in town?)

The real insult to the viewe's intelligence, though, comes via a scripted commercial for the production company at the end of the vid. Who knew porn-loving dykes should be honored that director Reina is"an outsider wh's not contaminated by the stagnant traditions that plague the adult film industr"? Sure, no smarmy set-ups and poorly-scripted dialogue here!

We must also take note that the company pays special attention to their sets."Notice the richness of the fabrics, as well as the color provided by all the flowers" the cute brunette narrator instructs. The richness of the fabrics and the color of the flowers. Guess the concept of pussies and asses getting reamed matters little when there are panty-drenching set designs to focus on.

And of course, i's the"formal costuming, unusual toys and fresh face" that ought to be getting us hot (since when were Tara Wild and Kelly Fire fresh faces?).

But the real kicker is this one: the vid purports to"show what lesbians really do behind closed doors"

Thanks so much, Queeny Queer: next time this femme reviewer gets it from a hot butch, sh'll close the door... and finally, a real lesbian experience will be at... well, le's say hand,'cause w're pretty sure none of these"lesbian" would dream of fisting one another when there are rich fabrics and flowers to behold.