"All tennis pro boards are dykes!" tabloid editor Ron Jeremy declares. "Commie dykes make good press." So by extension of logic you got to figure that Commie tennis pro broad dykes make for even better adult videos, if not creditable dinner companions for Boris Yeltsin. And so it happens, at least in French Open (go figure that title), that director Giovanni is able to milk the locker room/dyke concept in more ways than one, evidence the really nice shower scene in the title sequence proving that the relationship between Zara Whites and Tracey Wynn is all milk and honey. Cute Felina Fabre is no Siberian huskie when it comes to affecting a Russian accent, but her scene with Marc Wallice (an anal) works in all languages. And Favre lather shares a scene with Tera Hart that's equally pulse-pounding.

Tracey Winn and Candace Heart wind up giving it to two guys right up the butt. Zara Whites: "Bullsheet – I godda best beckhend in da beezeness" has to give in to wallice who's the tennis coach if she wants to stay on the team. The Whites/Wallice matchup is beautifully orchestrated with an overhead projection system. Stylish and alive and shows what you can do with a little imagination.