Years ago the Kick Ass Commandments (all natural/all naked/no condoms) reset the pornographic limbo bar, but every once in a while it's healthy to jazz up the routine. With Baren at the helm that's pretty unlikely. His directorial canon is much like Johnson's baby shampoo: lather, rinse, repeat — and no more tears! That is to say ... it's always dependable ... yet mild and predictable.

Kyle Stone adds a dash of foot fetishism to his romp with Romano, while the other Stones — Rosario and Lee — rock 'n roll with some fine gynecological gymnastics. However it's a Tedeshi/Amore hookup that (despite its “Mister, wanna buy a bag of oranges?” scenario) actually clocks in as the hottest hookup, chemistry-wise. Unfortunately, while all the other gals take hot shots in the mouth, Amore avoids them like the INS.