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Porn Wars: Episode 3

Porn Wars: Episode 3

Released Mar 31st, 2007
Running Time 103
Director Kovi
Companies Private U.S.A., Pure Play Media
Cast Antonio Ross, Vanessa Hill, Barbara Summer, Sabrina Rose (I), Liz Honey, Tiffany Rousso, Lauro Giotto, Victoria Swinger, Tera Bond, Horst Baron
Critical Rating AAAAA
Genre Feature

Rating

Synopsis

Director Kovi’s third chapter in his re-imagining of the popular Star Wars franchise finds Jodi Knights Antonio Ross and Choky Ice rescuing Commander Tera Bond

Reviews

Director Kovi’s third chapter in his re-imagining of the popular Star Wars franchise finds Jodi Knights Antonio Ross and Choky Ice rescuing Commander Tera Bond from the clutches of evil Empress Victoria Swinger and Seth Lord Horst Baron. Ross, weakened by an inner struggle with the dark side, is unaware that he has been bugged by the Seths and allowed to escape.

With the location of the last Jodi base finally revealed, Empress Swinger prepares to Al-Qaeda the shit out of it with a ship full of explosives flown in by Lord Baron. Swinger’s underling Vanessa Hill finds the plan flawed. "He (Baron) will die with the explosion," she points out. "He wouldn’t like that plan very much." Swinger calms Hill’s nerves by shoving a crystal-like dildo up her snatch while lapping at her asshole.

Despite being pleased by the warmth of Swinger’s tongue, Hill is disturbed by the Empress’s cold-blooded nature. Hill sends her servant Barbara Summer to warn the Jodi about Swinger’s plan. Summer establishes trust by allowing Ice to dig for mynocks in her colon. After taking Ice’s pop on her chest, she takes the Jodi to Swinger’s headquarters where she, Bond and Ross exchange blows with Swinger and Seth Lord Giotto in the climatic finale.

Although the performers accents are thicker than Chewbacca’s coat and the plot has become about as muddy as the waters in the Dagobah system, the Porn Wars series continues to be more fun than a barrel of wookies. And, still, not an Ewok in sight!

Pre-nom: Best Foreign Feature.

Retailing: Complete the triology.

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