Tony Tedeschi has found The Girl (Teanna Kai): She's rich and she loves sex, even though she's a virgin and will lose her inheritance if she actually has sex before she's married. This is better than his current wife (Cailey Taylor), who has cheated on him, with his best friend, yet. So Tedeschi blackmails Kyle Stone into marrying her, in a ceremony conducted by a hungover Herschel Savage, reading from a thesaurus, sitting in a tub with a naked woman on the edge. The happy threesome heads off to a hot-sheet motel ("It's $19.95. For three hours. And that doesn't include the porno channel.") and Stone is dispatched across the street so Tedeschi and Kai can do the deed. But Kai gets down with maid Tanya Danielle on the vibrating bed, with a vibrating vibrator. Kai decides that maybe she doesn't want to be married - or straight - after all. So they get Savage to rewrite the marriage license so Kai can marry Danielle. While they wait, Tedeschi goes down the hall and screws Holly Hollywood. He sets up Kai with Daisy Chain and gets Savage to marry them. It doesn't work out, and Kai winds up with Stone, and Tedeschi is plotting a bank robbery at the fadeout.
Witty Cash Markman script ("It seems like it was yesterday." "When did all this happen?" "Yesterday.") and cable-excisable sex scenes give this the feeling of a clever sitcom with a little sex in it.