So you say you want to be a star.  It used to be that you had to go to Hollywood and either park cars or put on a tight sweater and hang out at Schwab’s waiting to be discovered.  The next phase was method acting out of Lee Strassberg’s School and off-Broadway.  Today, all you need is a video camera, a bed, and the capacity to drop your drawers in public.

What we have here is sort of a “New Faces (and other parts) of 1983.”  He is your big chance if you are brave enough.  The worldwide search for new talent has begun.  Exhibitionists only need apply.

Home Movies is the first in a proposed series of performances by unknowns, each trying to make waves in the business of erotica.

We have two segments; a sort of amateur Swedish Erotica.  The first, Wet Nurses, brings us Gina Martel as a private nurse tending the needs of Frank James, a construction worker who has been injured on the job.  He lives, as do all menials, in a mansion, complete with electronic gates and other trappings.  So much for reality. She believes in her work so, of course, she tends his privates. Then he tends hers, and for a finale they tend each others.  So much for plot.  Miss Martel is a lovely creature and Mr. James is hung like a bull.  The pair work well together and the sex acts are excellently staged and photographed.

The second audition stars Kimberly Carson, Desiree Lane, and Tom Byron in something called After Hours.  The boss and his secretary are rearranging the papers on his desk with her buns, when suddenly the wife walks in on them.  What will happen net?  Will the wife off the secretary?  Of course not.  Seems the Sec caught the wife in a lesie bar. Will she tell hubby?  Of course not. The girls play licky-face.  The guy is up to the challenge and at the end the girls ride off into the sunset leaving the boss to clean up the mess.  I think there is supposed to be a moral there.  He who plays with his sword, etc.

It’s really not great theater, but then again it isn’t supposed to be.  It is an attempt to infuse fresh blood into an art form controlled by a few.  There is nothing new except the faces and bodies and style.

What I’d truly like to see is average everyday people doing it.  how about two middle-aged folks, the guy losing his hair, the lady a little overweight.  If the concept is that these are real people, and that they are willing to share themselves with us voyeurs, then let’s see real people.  If the producers have real films of real people, share them with us folks who believe there is a difference between having sex and making love.  I like Home Movies, and want to see more.