Released | Feb 01st, 1988 |
---|---|
Running Time | 79 to 90 |
Director | Paul Thomas |
Companies | Cal Vista Video, VCA Pictures |
Cast | Tom Byron, Megan Leigh, Candy Samples, Alicia Monet, Jacqueline Lorians, John Leslie, Desiree West, Tracey Adams, Desiree Cousteau, Teresa Orlowski, Lotto Top, Mike Homer, Nikki Knights, Kay Parker |
Critical Rating | AAA |
Genres | All-Sex, Feature |
Hey everybody, it's story time! Lately, several video firms have been pumping out adult versions of popular children's fairy tales. This time Mother Goose tells us about Beauty And The Beast. Set in the Fourteenth Century, Mike Horner plays a traveling peddler who must support his two grown daughters by selling leeches door-to-door. He does poorly until approaching the Beast, played by John Leslie. Although he unloads his complete stock, the Beast tricks Horner into trading his daughter, Beauty (Tracey Adams) to him for marriage. But Beauty doesn't want him. It's the other daughter (Nikki Knights) who has eyes for the Beast.
For a sexvid, Beauty And The Beast has excellent production qualities. Sets come across well, the stars appropriately play the story line for laughs and transition scenes provide some great fun. Although some erotic sequences are too short, most are hot. There is a nice variety of sex including some great "raised skirt" action by Nikki Knights. The color and sound are fine throughout.
For those who are tired of the deadly serious melodramatic sexvids, Beauty And The Beast offers an excellent alternative. It's a fun tape most will enjoy viewing repeatedly!
I used to love bedtime stories... you know, the kind that were supposed to help you sleep. Beauty And The Beast, on the other hand, is an attempt to keep you... up. Unfortunately, this Beauty isn't much different from the rest. There's just not a whole lot to stay up for.
Admittedly, Beauty is a clever, witty retelling of the familiar fairy tale, complete with costumes, good-looking girl, ugly prince, a curse, a kiss and happily ever after. But with that familiar a story, you need more than clever lines and good acting to stand out: you need great sex! And this Beauty just isn't up to par.
To be fair, there's good variety in the sex scenes, including a number of scenes with two women and a lot of oral technique. But the display is standard bump-and-grind, with a very mechanical, frenzied, speeded-up pace .The actors are there working hard, but the impression is that this is just a job. Nikki Knights and Jerry Butler both just seem to go through the motions. And, the truly strange camera angles (is that a stomach?) only add to the viewers's sense of distance.
But, as in all good fairy tales, Beauty (Tracy Adams) saves the day. She sizzles in her scene with John Leslie (Lord Beastington, looking good in full facial hair), as she realizes that what's in a man's heart is equally as important as what's in his pants. The two of them create the only scene that displays immense heat or passion. Mike Horner is also very good, but it is his acting ability that truly shines.
It's a shame. I wanted to love this Beauty, and I'm sure others will. The technical quality is good, and overall, it's cute. But that's not enough. Beauty and her Beast may live happily ever after...the rest of us might just as well turn off the lights and go to sleep.
What a wonderful idea for a video! Take a classic kiddie story and turn it upside down sexually. Paul Thomas has combined a wonderfully witty script with some incredible sex scenes for a well-acted classic shot-on-video feature.
Lovely Tracey Adams plays Beauty to John Leslie's Beast (very realistic mask) with Mike Horner doing his best Jerry Lewis as Beauty's father. The fractured fairy tale mixes in other stories, with even Mother Goose doing a sexual cameo. All the acting and, more importantly, all the sex is superb.
While the Nikki Knights (very cute) and Tom Byron scene stands out, the tantalizing Tracey Adams/John Leslie Beauty/Beast scene is sweaty, swarmy and erotically perfect. Jacqueline Lorians is a little animal in her two sexual stints while Megan Leigh, Lisa Bright and the rest of this very attractive cast perform one highlight after another.
Of course, the story rolls along to its "Happily Ever After" ending, but not without great doses of humor and sex in this technically superb feature. It's early in 1988, but I'll bet this one will make a lot of '"Ten Best" lists at the end of the year.
Sometimes, when I get a particularly interesting tape to review for AVN, I call some friends over to watch. All five of us were favorably taken with Beauty And The Beast, the adult version of the fairy tale of childhood.
Mother Goose (Alicia Monet) presents the story, introducing Lyle Notapenney (Mike Homer), the widower father of two 13th Century lovelies, Nikki Knights and Tracey Adams. Returning from his journey to sell leeches, peddler Lyle accepts the hospitality of Lord Beastington (John Leslie), a wealthy but beastly-looking nobleman. The hospitality includes a romp with the lovely Jacqueline Lorains. But Lyle picks a rose from Beastington's garden and his host demands that in return for the rose, Lyle must bring his daughter, Beauty (Adams). By the end, as most of us know, Beauty's love/lust for the Beast removes the spell and everyone lives lasciviously ever after.
First, let me say that this is an outstanding video. The dialogue is witty, the women, especially newcommer Alicia Monet, are all gorgeous, most of the cast are experienced actors with a superb senseof what they are doing. Lorians, as expected, has a perfect British accent, and Monet has fantastic potential, showing talent and presence that shine. My friend Doug wants to buy a copy of Beauty And The Beast to watch with his wife, and we all agreed that this is perfect for couples. There is humor and sex a-plenty to satisfy all tastes.
I didn't give this a perfect score for two reasons. First, there are just too many anachronisms to suite me. Electric lights, 1980s lingerie and the like stand out too much. There are some funny references to modern underwear and board games, but a bit more attention could and should have been given to costumes and sets.
The other reason I hold out is to emphasize that there's always room for improvement, though I must admit not much is lacking here. (If the producers will give me some time alone with Mother Goose, I might be persuaded to ....)
"Hey, Rock, Watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat! Prethto. Wrong hat."
Wrong Bullwinkle segment. Director Paul Thomas' latest foray into costume shop goofiness lands squarely on its feet with a video that reminds you of "Fractured Fairy Tales" from the old "Rocky & Bullwinkle Show." Obviously you've got to go to the North Woods to top the hip humor inspired by Jay Ward. But Beauty And The Beast by all standards of account has an anachronistic innocence (for instance, there's an Imana electric range in the country kitchen: and Mozart's playing in the background 300 years ahead of this tale's time) and a lighthearted ditsiness about it that's kind of precious in its own way.
Mike Horner, perhaps getting a trifle too much like watching John Ritter in reruns of "Three's Company," is the stumblebum door to door leech salesman, Lyle Notapenny whose daughter is Beauty (Tracey "why are you wearing a peasant dress with white high heels?" Adams). In his travels Horner gets into a quasi-Scrabble match with Lord Beastington (John Leslie), ugly of face with a Chewbaca mask, but pure of intention and a lousy speller. The fairy tale setup, of course, is that Beastington will renovate into a prince charming courtesy of Beauty and love's first wet shot. (Basically Adams' only real sex scene discounting clit manip).
The supporting players have the better of it, particularly beguiling Jacqueline Lorians who puts a great deal of spunk into her part as Beastie's Cockney scullery maid. Lorians provides the real guts in this sexvid, while the wish is that Mother Goose (Alicia Monet) had stuck around for what tends to be little more than prelim goosing and story lady tie-ins. Nikki Knights' shot-and-beer sexuality adds a nice little rough edge while everyone else seems to be bent on roaming about the countryside in storybook grace and nobility. But that seems to be just about the right balance for a successful couples' vid these days.
No, this isn't the return of "Wangito, the Wonder Donkey," so get those thoughts out of your head right now! Nor does this Beauty And The Beast have any relation to the current TV show. This is a not-at-all Grimm fairy tale that sparkles with sly wit, a winning cast and sex scenes that will strain your codpiece.
Just to show that you don't tamper with the classics, the plot closely follows the original fable. Poor peddler Mike Horner plucks a rose for his daughter (Tracey Adams), unaware that the rose comes from the garden of the hideous Lord Beastington (John Leslie in a superb make-up job). Leslie spares Homer's life, but demands that Adams spend a night in his "quastle" (that's a joke you'll get once you see the video). As can be imagined (since this is a fairy tale), they live happily ever after.
Please don't get the idea, though, that you can mistake this Beauty And The Beast for the "Fairie Tale Theatre" one. A sizzling trio with Homer's less virginal daughter, Nikki Knights, sets the tone for the feature. Tom Byron is good as a randy handyman. Starlets like Jacqueline Lorians and Megan Leigh give their all, but the best scenes are certainly those with Adams, one of adult cinema's hottest stars. The entire cast comes together with an infectious, easy-going charm that blends nicely into the video's pastoral atmosphere. Production values are top-notch, with love scenes for every
Let me start my review by saying something incredibly nice. Beauty And The Beast made me laugh out loud. I have never said that before, but then I have never laughed out loud at an erotic feature before. Therefore, you may surmise that Beauty And The Beast must be funny erotic video. Correct Emundo, my prurient friends. Writer-director Paul Thomas has concocted a bright, witty teleplay and surrounded himself with a cast which can turn a line as well as expose their cans.
Needless to say, Thomas has reworked the legendary tale into an outstanding sexual farce. Mike Horner as the poor but honest tradesman, aptly named Lyle Notapenny, Tracey Adams as his beautiful but horny daughter named Beauty, and John Leslie, unrecognizable under a superb mask as the Beast, lead a great cast. Horner leaves his family to peddle his wares, and on his way home he stops at Lord Beastington's manor. After he feeds himself, he feeds his frenzy with the maid, Jacqueline Lorians (Brilliant as a Tart), and on his departure he takes a rose to give Beauty. The Lord catches him, but trades the rose for a night with Beauty. Of course Beauty is repulsed by the Beast, but after she thinks about his loneliness, not to mention his riches, she goes back and submits to him, which turns him back into the handsome man he was before he was cursed, and they live happily ever after.
This is a delightful romp which provides the entire cast with the opportunity to give great lines as well as great you-know-what. Another clever twist is that the narrator of the fable is Mother Goose (Alicia Monet), which gives me a chance to say that by the end of this feature everyone, including Mother Goose, get stuffed.
Although very ambitious and hot in a few scenes, Beauty And The Beast stands as one of those sexvids that loses sight of what it is. The loaded script contains many attempts at humor, but most fall flat. We're all a little tired of Mike Horner's goofball thing and it really wears thin here.
The first half of Beauty And The Beast labors along without very much sex. It's only when our heroine Beauty (played by the miraculous Tracey Adams) meets up with the Beast (John Leslie) that the feature takes off sexually. And a Nikki Knights/Tom Byron liaison highlights the tape.
I guess the point is that these tapes should have the right sexual pace and people might be bored with the story for a while. It does pick up, though, with Lisa Bright and Jacqueline Lorians turning in hot sexual performances. But for all its lofty ambitions, Beauty and the Beast is only excellent for half a show. Fast forward through the first half and Horners's tired action and get to the steamier second half.
(Note: High marks for director Paul Thomas and his staff. They spent quite a bit of money on this sexvid and it shows.)
Occasionally you run across a new video that reminds you of the old days when adult features were often witty and the performers looked happier about performing. Usually, when you find such a video, you find someone from those days at the helm.
Such a person is former adult actor Paul Thomas, and such a video is Beauty And The Beast, a sexy spoof on the fairy tale of the same name, with a few other fairy tales thrown in for good measure. Aside from some harsh, amateurish lighting, and the fact that it is shot in generic video fashion, this feature will remind you of any of a number of adult classics. It's got everything - good performances, zany humor, and loads of hot sex.
Veteran John Leslie does the honors as the Beast, in a makeup job worth the price of a rental alone. Tracey Adams, as Beauty, turns in a clever performance and gets it from the Beast in the end.
But the real sexual heroes of this video are the underrated Nikki Knights, who rocks through numerous encounters with the likes of Tom Byron and Jerry Butler, and that lovely Brit, Jacqueline Lorians, who gets my vote.
With lovely ladies like these leading the way through a fairy tale full of silly jokes (imagine opening a velcro fly in the 15th century) you're guaranteed a good time.
The classic story for the young at heart becomes a classic adult video for those who feel young a bit lower. What a treat it has become to thoroughly enjoy adult entertainment enhanced by both amusing dialogue and superior production.
The story is told by a very hot Mother Goose who enjoys not only narrating, but often actively participating in, the erotic escapades of the story's various characters. Tracey Adams plays the perfect Beauty with enough innocence and charm to almost convince the viewer she's virginal, but at the same time giving us that special smile and look to let us know it's all taken in good down and dirty fun. In fact, one of the video's best features is its sense of humor. While some of the jokes may be a bit corny, there are many funny moments that really help the story and action move along at a pleasant pace.
Also turning in fine sexual performances are Mike Homer as Lyle Notapenny (Beauty's father), John Leslie (Lord Beastington, a.k.a. the Beast), and Nikki Knights (Beauty's insatiable sister). The costumes, sets and other production aspects are, for the most part, first rate and add a great deal to the video despite numerous and perhaps intentional non-period inclusions (i.e. stainless steel sinks, nylons, recliners, etc.).
This is one of those rare videos that would work at a bachelor party, as a night home-alone companion or as a cuddle-up show for affectionate couples. With all the terrific things Beauty And The Beast has going for it, it seems certain those who watch it will, like the characters, end up following the last line of the story. "And they all came happily ever after."
Maybe it sounds almost dumb to say in the context of eroticism, but these Cal Vista Best Of tapes are also very educational.
Again, porn historian Jim Holliday does the honors adding little intros and anecdotes to clips featuring the heralded big mama jamas of the bosom set. But the emphasis here is not on jug scenes, so this isn't your basic solo girl tit giggle tape.
What is nice from several standpoints is that both the actress and the actor is credited prior to the sex scene, and wonder of wonders, a complete videography is offered at the conclusion of the tape so you can tell which film and video the scenes are from. That is the true purpose of an anthology, to allow the viewer to do further research and exploration on his own.
You'll have your favorites among these scenes. Certainly every lady who has busted a bra at one time or another is included. A great tape both for the serious collector and the sensualist.
Also as a little bonus, the stag featurette The Payoff is included, although time has long erased the picture quality and the ability to read the idiot cards flashed on the screen. But you'll get the drift.