There's a legendary tale about a Roger Gorman shoot many years ago, set in an old (rented) castle. As it happened, filming wrapped a couple of days early, so then-little-known actor Jack Nicholson approached Gorman to ask if he could write a movie to be shot during the remaining two days. Gorman agreed, and the result was The Terror, a cheesy macabre tale of the Napoleonic wars, starring Nicholson and Boris Karloff.

The point is, since Kelly Close-up was shot at the big, white-walled mansion commonly known in the trade as "the Vivid house", and since the story here seems cobbled together from lines cut from some unaired "Columbo" script, this tape has all the flavor of The Terror — or one of those Mickey Rooney/Judy Garland "Hey, kids, we've got two days to get ready; let's put on a play!" movies — done deadpan.

My vote for best sex scene in this vid is the opener, between dark-haired Victoria Andrews and Jon Dough. Though it's hard to tell whether Victoria's pleasure squeals are coming from Dough's pumping or her own clit-fingering, the result is quite satisfying. Too bad her later girl/girler with Kelly is cut short; from what I hear, it could have gotten real interesting.

The biggest disappointment here, though, is Kelly herself. She only fleetingly seems to get into the spirit of the action, and her lines are too minimal to develop a character; hence, her frisk-turned-tryst with Buck Adams and Nick East has all the verve of well-cooked fettucini. Somewhat better is her closer with Dough, but he seems to be doing all the work, and if she's enjoying it, she's pretty damn quiet about it.

In between is the Shelby Stevens/Ian Daniels match-up, but we've seen that many times before. It's always good, rarely great — and that about says it all.

Of interest is the final six-minute "behind the scenes" mini-feature, but they might have considered saving such an idea for a more interesting video. Technical aspects are up to the usual Vivid standards; too bad the story and acting aren't. Jaye's boxcover appeal, however, will override these factors and make this a healthy renter.