Those filthy folks at Private return to the inaptly named Virgin Islands, this time to St. Thomas, and mine incredible sexual treasures. The Private film series, which has enjoyed wide critical and popular acclaim so far, seems to have adopted a formula. In line with the current fad, inspired in part by the "pitch" scenes in The Player (for example, Forrest Gump plus Being There equals Dan Quayle), let me try to pin it down, thus: the Emmanuelle series plus the Mermaids series, plus some of the freshest, dirtiest, most lushly-photographed hardcore in recent memory, equals Private Film. When you add the twin penchants Private has for showcasing American stars in heights that they may not have reached in domestic productions (reference Kitty Yung here, or Lydia Chanel in Anal Clinic, or Danyel Cheeks in Anal Manor, for example), and finding some incredible European new faces and bodies, we're talking near-instant-classic status.

I would readily pit Private babes like Stephanie Hart-Rogers, Janey Lamm, and this vid's Erica Red against, for instance, some of Jim Holliday's "hidden hammers" as being worthy of cultish remembrance.

So what gives with the Emmanuelle/Mermaids comparisons? Well, VT2, like several others in the series, features a not-entirely-innocent, but not yet wholly-decadent young nubile — Kitty Yung in this case — not unlike the Emmanuelle character; plunked down in exotic locales (as in both the other series), with plenty of beach frolicking, surfside sex, and underwater photography — and these "Mermaids" fuck their brains out!

The series also tends to feature a slightly older, more experienced, waay decadent sexual mentor(ess?), who leads said young nubile down the garden path, the pool path, the beach path, the anal path, the d.p. path, and so on. In VT2, Gina Brittania plays Carla, who invites college friend Kitty to share her Virgin Isle retreat, her male sex slaves (with an exceptional sexual performance by the immortal Joey Verducci), her mate-swapping friends, and her hobby of spying on couples fucking on her beach. Gina starts things off by jerking her stud slaves off onto a bowl of grapes, which she lovingly wraps her tongue around.

This oral appetizer serves as a warmup for a demonstration of her superb oral skills with both guys. Kitty takes over, swallowing both men, taking Joey up her quivering butt, and a huge double facial from the pair. An orgy with married friends and their blonde maid ensues, with the highlights being Verducci's inspired ass-banging of the slender French brunette wife (what killer thighs she's got!) , and hubby's standing kata with Gina.

The true sexual peaks of this show feature busty auburn-haired beauty Erica Red. First, she bangs her boyfriend in the surf with such abandon that I winced at how the sand must have rubbed them raw in tender places. Next, she shares a memorable girl/girler, featuring a long necklace of anal beads (an ass-lace? I dunno!), with wifey from the orgy (Katy Junoz). Best of all, comes a three-way, in pirate costume, fantasized by Kitty, where Erica takes on the husband (Alberto Rey) and Joey in one of the best sex scenes of the year. Most of it takes place on the trunk of a palm tree that the windwards have bent to near parallel to the ground,- and rest assured, you will never spot even a low-hanging tree branch again and view it without a fugitive memory of the positions it can afford, as demonstrated in true virtuoso fashion in this scene.

A closing masked orgy (doesn't everyone celebrate finding buried pirate booty this way?) features two d.p.'s, including the blonde maid (Sidonie).

Along with Steve Perry, director Frank Thring has been a mainstay of this series, and while the orgy scenes share the flaw of most, of risking continuity in sexual arousal by quick cuts of sexual variety, the pacing is admirable, and the direction sure. (Film buff note: although some may think that this Frank Thring is the famous Australian actor/director — remember Tina Turner's loupe-wearing accountant-in-leathers in Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome? — that's Frank Thring — I don't believe it is, because this Thring was listed in the cast of, I believe, Anal Manor, and I spotted no 300-lb. 70-year-old Aussies in that video. Sorry.) Whoever this particular Thring is, long may he do his thring to my thring — and kudos to American veteran cameraman Jane Waters for a nomination-worthy lens job.

It's only right to close by mentioning that Kitty Yung gets better every time I see her, but please Kitty, don't be tempted into any more surgical "improvements" — we love you just the way you are.