In his memorable closer with Rebecca Lord, sleazemeister supreme Jamie Gillis gives Jim Carey and Chris Tucker a run for their money in the yucks department with one of the most spontaneously side-splitting porn moments of the year. As the super-bitchy French beauty grabs a clump of Gillis' graying locks and starts manipulating her sub's movements like some perverse puppeteer, Jamie, being a very bad boy indeed, suddenly violently pulls away from her grasp and starts growling at her like a mad dog. This of course, earns him a slap across the chops and a shrill 'What do you think you're doing?' from the horrified, indignant Lord. She then throws him to the ground, where, completely out of control at this point, he growls even louder, netting him a hard kick in the side, which finally shuts him up. It's called topping from the bottom, folks, and in this instance, it's funny as hell.

The rest of the scene - a clash of two fetish tape titans set in an atmospheric basement - is equally riveting as the stunning, svelte Lord, never looking hotter (the abs on that woman!) flogs the shit out of Gillis (his decidedly uncut body, in stark contrast, looks like it's never been near a gym in its life). While Lord has been roundly criticized in these pages for her brutal, harsh (read: poor) technique, if anyone deserves such treatment, it's the guy who takes such delight in making little girls cry when a Top.

Which is exactly what he does in scene two to gorgeous blue-eyed-blonde Sadie Belle, whose statuesque frame is on mouth-watering display in a rust-colored latex mini that's practically spray-painted on. Despite Belle's ballsy attitude, Gillis breaks her quite easily with some patented verbal abuse - "Look how stupid she looks guys," he says at one point while parading her in front of the camera in the dungeon setting. "Can you even jerk off to that stupid bitch?" - and some moderately-hard-at-best flogging with a lightweight little pink pussy whip (what exactly does RedBoard have against real equipment?). What a wimp.

The unimpressive opener, meanwhile, has Tony Eveready topping two only moderately attractive females with clips and a black dildo in an outdoor setting. Overly giggly, lacking intensity, the scene is largely disposable.