Greenpeace Releases Guide to (Environmentally) Safe Sex

Those who preach the revering of nature's resources also tend to practice the spreading of free love, if the Age of Aquarius proved anything, so it seems perfectly fitting that environmental protection organization Greenpeace would issue a guide to keeping it eco-friendly in the bedroom.

Among the tips offered in the guide, as reported by the Associated Press, are:

• Using soy-based lubes.

• Taking joint showers.

• Turning the lights off.

• Using bamboo bed sheets (which supposedly are "super sexy").

• Wearing lingerie made from renewable fibers such as hemp and bamboo.

• Purchasing only phthalate-free sex toys.

Sex toy retailers mentioned as supporters of these guidelines included Good Vibrations and Babeland, whose Rebecca Denk commented, "We have to look at every piece of our lives, including our sexuality, and ask, 'How is this healthy for me, and how is this healthy for the planet?' Hopefully, we're all becoming better global citizens."

For anybody who prefers their porn stars … um … earthy, meanwhile, spokesperson Jacob Gordon pointed up the existence of X-rated herbivore site No confirmation could be obtained on whether the site advocates sex with vegetables.