Global Media Sez: 'Who Needs A Story? It's 3D!'

NEW YORK—Several adult companies currently have 3D projects in the works, and a few like Funky Monkey/New Sensations, Tommy Gunn Entertainment and Dominic Ford have released storyline-based 3D features—but New York-based Global Media International Films is set to sneak in a disc or two of what they think adult entertainment fans really want to see: All-sex 3D featuring exotic beauties from around the world with no sign of a script anywhere.

"I'm not from the school of, 'Make a movie and let's write a corny script to go along with it'," assured Global Media honcho Dave Copeland. "I want beauty and heat and sex. We don't need to humor ourselves with a cops-and-robbers story, with people in corny outfits doing corny things. There's no dialog in a foreign language to indicate they aren't from around here. The experience is a whole experience. You're not watching them and forgiving them for speaking Dutch or anything like that. It's the universality of sex, of beauty, of hot girls, of universal moans and groans. Anybody on earth can look at it and relate to it without any kind of glitch in the experience."

Copeland's got two disks full of 3D fucking and sucking ready to go, and fans can get a taste of the action by watching the trailer on his website,—and if viewers don't already have the necessary red/blue anaglyph glasses, that's no problem either: The site has a short video clip that tells you how to make your own 3D glasses with felt-tipped markers.

And what will those fans see?

"The stuff is being shot both here and in Russia, and we've even got stuff coming from Thailand," Copeland detailed. "They don't have California stars in them. We're scheduled to end up in L.A. and shoot some scenes, but my guy is certainly going out of his way to find very attractive people and that, I think, is the most unique part of the thing, is to see these beautiful, statuesque people in 3D. The particular guy that shoots the material for us is a beautiful person. He lives between a beautiful apartment on the Lower East Side, an apartment in Moscow and a place on the beach, so as he goes, he carries his camera."

"I'm waiting to see the stuff being shot in Thailand," he continues. "We're literally working on a whole outdoor experience. We're going to do some club life/New York City stuff, some street stuff, and really bring the 3D experience forward besides just from the sucking and fucking angle; the world in 3D is pretty fucking neat too, you know, and if we can get hot girls dancing in a club or doing some extraordinary stuff, or some sideshow action or whatever it is—as long as it's got nudity and hot girls, it will sell."

Global Media is putting the finishing touches on two discs, each featuring four full 3D sex scenes, that should be ready for retailers within the month.

"We were in production for a lot longer than I thought we were going to be," Copeland admitted. "The compression of the thing was just amazingly time-consuming, to make it work properly. I would say that the total compression time from start to finish was probably about 36 hours, and that's with a pretty decent computer, just to do it in HD and get the aspect ratio and everything correct, so it looks as good as it can be. It was a lot more work than I thought, just trying to do something simple. It's been good schooling; I think we're ready to write the Wiki on it over here."

Global Media is aiming to make its 3D output the "total package" in more ways than one. For one thing, the back of the DVD cover has five anaglyph photos, four of them hardcore, and he hopes to convince retailers to have 3D glasses at the counter (or better still, at the video rack itself) so potential buyers/renters can get a taste of the action up front.

"We're trying to make glasses available at the retailer, so they can put the glasses on in the store and see the 3D package," Copeland said. "I think it's important that they pick it up and know that it's a 3D product, even if their initial view of it is a little off-center. We're all used to looking at stuff in 3D without 3D glasses, knowing that it's 3D, and going, 'God, I wish I had glasses.'"

Perhaps more importantly, though, the website is set up to allow users to play the anaglyph trailer on their iPod Touch, iPad and even their iPhone.

"It works incredibly on the iPhone," Copeland said. "You put it on an iPhone and it's like you're holding a little diorama of little people; it's so cool. It's a great novelty act. I'm walking around my building and knocking on doors, saying, 'Check this shit out; check this shit out.' And I'm holding the iPhone. The mobile business is ready for 3D and we're there with it. The iPad needs it as well. I haven't heard anybody else having it for iPhone."

(Well, there was one...)


"There's a lot more of the best to come," Copeland assured. "We're probably backed up about eight 3D titles, and we'll check sales of the first one to see how it goes. We'll let the market get out in front of itself, but I'd like to see one a month come out on a regular basis and if the market picks up, we'll add more. But I think it's important not to overwhelm the retailers, the consumers. You can't start throwing balls at people and expect them to catch every one. They need to open the box and experience it."

Still, Copeland has no problem waxing enthusiastic about 3D's big-screen possibilities.

"The big screen effect of it is just outrageous," Copeland raved. "When I first started bringing it in over the internet, downloading these huge files and playing it off of the data in my lab room, and I flip it to the big screen, I yelled to my daughter, 'Come here; you're not going to believe this.' My daughter puts on the glasses and says, 'Holy shit!' And that's from a young person."

"3D is part of the MySpace/Facebook generation world," he assessed. "We [older folks] saw 3D movies growing up but what did we see? Robot Monster? The new thing is Avatar; made a billion bucks in its first few weeks. So the kids are ready for it, and my feeling is, do what I can do as best as I can do it, and deliver something that's of good quality and unique. Why make an epic movie? We're making porn. We're looking at beautiful girls doing beautiful things."