The news of Ron Jeremy's death, again, has been greatly overexaggerated. Al Goldstein ran an editorial in the April 1 issue of Screw mourning Jeremy's accidental death in a Florida fish tank at the hands of manatees. It was an April Fool's gag.
"He's such a putz," says Jeremy. "He [Goldstein] always finds new ways of annoying me, but it's kind of cute. He's trying to change my nickname from hedgehog to manatee. The way it started was that I did a few flips in his pool, and swam underwater for great distances. He said, 'Jesus Christ, for a fat guy, you're athletic. You're a manatee - you're lovable and very funny.' They're little hairy creatures, very curious, always friendly. In fact, they get chopped up by boat propellers because they want to check out what's going on. They're innocent and cute in a fat kind of way. They're an endangered species, so I'm going to file for tax exempt status. Hedgehog wasn't my favorite name, anyway, but they're kind of cute creatures, too. They've got hairy backs."
