I guess if you can fuck on a prow of a boat, you can fuck anywhere.
Earlier in the week, lensman Barry Woods scouted a location which featured, among other things, an Amazon-style setting right out of the film Anaconda - with hostile-looking waterways, alligators and tons of mosquitoes to go right along with it. For some reason, the description of Walt Disney's Davy Crockett comes to mind in all of this: "half-horse, half-alligator and a little touched with a snapping turtle". That could also be a description of Mila who was scheduled to get butt fucked on the prow of a motor boat which Woods has secured to head up river. Brian Surewood's along to do the anal honors on La Mila, and Kristen's scheduled to be part of the threesome, though not in an anal capacity. Brick Majors, a camera bug, wants to tag along to take snaps of alligators in their natural habitat ala Jacques Cousteau.
In a contest pitting Mila against an alligator, the smart money is on Mila one quickly learns from this video shoot.
"Haf an hour; haf an hour," Woods says in his thick, Royal House of Windsor accent, indicating a rendezvous time. "Another haf an hour; haf an hour, the van you see, the van…" says Woods when you hook up with him only to discover that, in Mexico, time is somewhat inconsequential. The van, which is way off Woods' proposed schedule of departure, turns out to be a rickety affair with no air conditioning and a guide named Pedro. Pedro's the color of tobacco juice and is built like a pipe cleaner.
"Hey, Pedro, where's my moto ?" asks Kristen as about ten people cram into the sweaty vehicle.
"No good to say that word," says Pedro nervously as he warns Kristen about the Federales who cruise the backroads looking for drugs and people who use them. All of which prompts Surewood to relay a story about a buddy of his who once got shot at and chased by the Federales for driving drunk. "He landed in a Mexican prison; went from 210 to 130 in a matter of months," says Surewood. "He got totally fucked up in the head."
One might harbor the same suspicions when Mila suggests that she wants to dive into some very murky-looking waters when the boat party begins its journey along God-knows-where. Everybody wants to see the 'gators, however. "Some of them can be size of this boat," Pedro says. "But they don't hurt you." Not in the movies I've seen, Pedro. "They more afraid of you than you them," Pedro claims.
The boat rolls softly and quietly up a stretch of waterway, thick with trees and birds that add some amazing jungle sound effects. The air is gamey and smells like the crotch of a fat lady's swimsuit. "Leaves decomposing in water," Pedro says to explain the odor. "Water is pretty clean."
"Can you drink this shit?"
"If you have to…."
Thanks, I'll take my chances with Perrier.
A couple of alligators are spotted, one a baby. "I want some dick!" Mila growls. Majors, on the other hand, wants to take pictures. "I've been waiting a long time to get wrecked in the ass, dude," Mila tells Surewood. Pedro and his paddlers look at one another in macho astonishment like, look at the mouth on this girl. Woods signals for the scene to get underway as Kristen and Mila do some preliminary girl-girl, after which Surewood moves in and starts moving the boat along of its own accord thrust through some amiable prick thrusts. Kristen and Woods begin having a muffled conversation about sanitary issues.
Kristen is saying something to the effect it's her health and she's not going to jeopardize it. Then she pulls herself out of the scene. I later asked her what that was all about. She said, 'To tell you the honest truth, I was turned off. It was a scene for Mila, and I pulled myself out because I didn't want to fuck up her scene." Kristen said it didn't have anything to do with Surewood. As you might suspect, a prow of a boat that's probably seen some funky addresses in this neck of the woods isn't exactly the ideal location to spread one's ass.
Mila and Surewood get around to the anal portion of the program. "You gonna wreck that ass, you piece of shit poodle dick!" Mila screams. How Surewood keeps it going in this oppressive heat and humidity is anyone's guess, but, by the time he's through, Surewood's face looks like the picture of thermonuclear combustion.
"I'm dying out here, guys," he says quite honestly. Perhaps half-jokingly Surewood asks Majors if he'd like to stunt-cock. Mila throws in the fact that she squirts, which seems to throw the implacable Majors for a loop. Mila demonstrates. To make a long story short, Surewood continues and proceeds to fuck the boat into several complete sets of 180-degree turns. Everyone's so captivated by the exhibition that few notice the sets of bubbles riding along side the boat. They disappear, then, if you sat real quiet, you could feel a mild jolt. Damned if a 'gator didn't swim under the boat.
Once finished, Mila wants to dive into the water. She's urged politely not to, but compromises with a finishing move. Surewood, taking his dick out of her ass, pops on her, then, with the help of Kristen, grabs Mila by the ankles and dunks her in the water. I casually glance off to the bank on my right. Damned if I didn't see what I saw. Right there in the middle of nowhere sits an expended bottle of Haley's MO lodged in the roots of a tree.
Someone's shot a sex scene here before, I think to myself.
