LOS ANGELES—Lad mag Maxim magazine has decided to assist sexually curious folks by publishing on its website a handy porn dictionary of popular (and not so popular) sexual terms.
“The world of pornography is a confusing (and fantastic) place,” Maxim’s Nick Leftley and Chris Wilson wrote. “In order for you, lovely reader, to better navigate the wide and wonderful world of XXX prefixes, we’ve gone and drawn up a handy guide to the best, the worst, and the downright weirdest."
Posted in the Stupid Fun section of its site, Maxim’s porn dictionary starts with Alt (“Alt porn mostly consists of small-breasted girls with tattoos looking miserable in a studio apartment. More notable practitioners include Eon McKai, the director behind Art School Sluts. They all get effed. Dirty talk for alt fans: ‘Fill the cold void of my emotions with your darkness,’ ‘Aim for the skull tattoo above my other skull tattoo.’”)
The dictionary ends with World of Warcraft (“The Whorecraft porn series that features elf-eared maidens copulating with dwarf warriors was forced to rename itself WhoreLore when Warcraft publisher Blizzard applied legal pressure in 2009. Nerds! Sample dialogue: ‘Hail, fare maiden! Did’st thou call for a barbarian to repaireth thy aqueduct? Or perhaps your puppet-cables needeth fixing?’”
The dictionary also was published in the magazine’s July issue along with pictures of Taryn Thomas (under Parody for her Jersey Shore send-up), Bridget the Midget (under Midgets), and Mia Rose and August (under World of Warcraft).
