The car horns echoing through the parking lot of the strip mall at the corner of Sunset and La Brea were a sure sign of yet another protest. But if the drivers’ bleats sounded more persistent, louder and seemed to emanate from cars driven by guys, perhaps it was due to protest placards such as “Keep our army ALL-natural,” “Plastic explosives, not plastic surgery,” and “Honk if you love natural breasts!” and the presence of some lovely young women…
The “Bullets Not Boobs” rally and press conference, held outside an armed forces recruiting center, was led by porn actress and former gubernatorial candidate Mary Carey, and organized by Kick Ass Pictures. The movement protests the U.S. military’s offer of plastic surgery, including breast enlargement, as a recruitment tool in this time of declining enlistment.
“Our military is setting a bad example for young women,” says the well-endowed but all-natural Mary Carey. “I understand that the armed services are desperate for new recruits given the current situation in Iraq. But as a taxpayer and a woman, I refuse to sit back and allow my money to be spent on disfiguring American women.”
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To that end, Kick Ass Pictures (home of the “No Fake Tits” guarantee) president Mark Kulkis decided to do something about it: They put out an offer, on their website and through radio interviews, to any female U.S. soldier honorably discharged after July 22, 2004 (the date the military’s breast-job offer was publicized), to come forward with her natural breasts and take part in the protest. In return, the woman receives a $1,000 natural beauty enhancement package consisting of lingerie and a luxurious day-spa treatment.
The first recipient, present at the rally, was former Army Specialist E-4 Jennifer Zandstra. Zandstra, who found out about the offer via a friend, was honorably discharged from the Army two weeks ago. Kick Ass Pictures flew her in from her home state of Texas for the rally. Zandstra, from a small town, seemed a bit overwhelmed, but excited amid all the hoopla, as she was handed a comically-oversized check for $500 from Carey and Kulkis. (The rest of the $1,000 was given in the form of high-end lingerie gift certificates.)
Zandstra called the military’s free plastic surgery practice a “waste of money” and seemed only too happy to be participating in the protest.
After the press conference, Carey and Zandstra posed for pictures, and Carey fielded questions about her part in the movement. “I think [what the military is doing] is wrong,” she said. “Women should have natural boobs. They should give them REAL money, not FAKE boobs.”
The goal of the movement, according to Kulkis, is to raise awareness, and to hopefully give the U.S. military enough bad press on this issue that they withdraw their offer. The offer is still open to former female U.S. soldiers who meet the requirements, and will remain open until the U.S. Military changes their policy, and allow our female soldiers to fight for their country in their all-natural, silicone-free state.
