If MapQuest had a sex site, directions to the G-spot would rank as the most queried address. If fact, many retailers report that questions about the G-spot rank among their most common customer inquiries. Meaning many things to many people, the G-spot is to its seekers the Holy Grail of female sexuality, to enthusiasts the gateway to splendid deep orgasms, and to female ejaculators it is the "get out the towel spot."
And, while debate about the G-spot lingers within the medical community, it is clear from the sheer volume of inquiries, the rocketing sales of G-spot toys, and the growing mass of satisfied customers, that the G-spot is here is to stay-and perhaps spray.
The market for G-spot toys and information has been on the upswing for some time. "It was clear from our years of consumer inquiries about the G-spot that our Babeland customers were wanting more-more help and more options, for G-spot play," says Rachel Venning, co-founder of Babeland, a retail chain dedicated to female consumers. "That's why we created a site dedicated solely to that topic. At GspotCenter.com, people get comprehensive information about how to find and enjoy their G-spots, as well as a shop with our top G-spot toys."
Novelty manufacturers also see increased demand. As the market for women's sexuality products expands, so does interest in G-spot products. "Our sale of G products has been steadily growing year to year, as the business gets more mainstreamed," says Al Bloom, marketing director for California Exotic Novelties. "We see G products as a larger category for concentration."
Another woman-centric retailer, Good Vibrations, reports consistent success with G-spot products. "[G-spot toys] all do very well for us," says senior buyer Coyote Days. "Our customers are curious about their bodies and look for the items that will allow them to experiment and expand their body knowledge. Right now, G-spot toys are that item."
The Story of G
The Grafenberg spot—so named for sex researcher Ernst Grafenberg, who first noted the area's erotic potential—is located approximately 2 inches inside the vagina, toward the belly, and directly behind the pubic bone. Despite popular misconception, the G-spot is not part of the vaginal wall itself, although it is the barrier through which the "true" G-spot can be stimulated. The jackpot rests on the other side of the wall, surrounding the lower part of the urethra. The urethral sponge, this soft, cushiony structure, became the genuine source of legend.
The G-spot most easily is reached with a curved toy or a partner's fingers bent toward the belly and moved in a "come here" motion. It also can be stimulated during intercourse in doggy-style-like positions, with the upper body slightly raised (for example, hands supported on the wall). According to sexologist Dr. Carol Queen, "There are two separate genital nerve pathways to the brain [that] carry sensation and orgasmic response. One is clitoral (or penile); the other is vaginal (or prostatic)."
The pelvic nerve (the prostatic pathway) is the route by which stimulation to the urethral sponge travels. It also involves the uterus and the anterior area of the PC muscles. This explains why many women find that firm, repetitive pressure to the aroused G-spot creates a unique, pleasurable sensation resulting in an orgasm that is distinctly different from those occurring with clitoral stimulation alone-and, additionally, why sensations resulting from rhythmic thrusting on the G-spot differ from those provided by deeper vaginal penetration or clit stimulation.
When a woman is aroused, her G-spot swells with blood and fluid, causing the area to become more plump. This engorgement allows the sponge to push into the vaginal canal, causing the G-spot area of the vaginal wall to stand out and become easier to identify. Using inter-vaginal photography, Dr. Michael Perry, owner of Access Instructional Media, illustrates these changes in his educational DVD The Amazing G-spot and Female Ejaculation.
Learning the ABGs
Women who hunt for their spot when un-aroused tend to come up empty handed; those who get turned on may be stymied by an exasperating need to urinate, not to mention the fear of actually peeing. Some women ejaculate clear fluid when they have a G-spot orgasm, which is a normal part of sexual response; however, the sensation can be distressingly similar to the need to urinate.
Consider also the fact that there are many myths surrounding the G-spot, everything up to and including that it actually doesn't exist-and it's no wonder many women are confused and lack the knowledge to enjoy their G-spots fully. As a retailer, you're in a great position to help your customers overcome these obstacles and achieve great orgasms!
Here are seven steps you can offer customers for rocking the G-spot:
- Get turned on. Use a vibrator, watch porn, read erotica, fantasize-do whatever works to ratchet up arousal before spelunking for the G.
- Strengthen vaginal muscles through Kegel exercises. This will increase a woman's awareness of her sexual response and can increase the pleasure of G-spot stimulation. To do a simple Kegel exercise, squeeze the pelvic muscles as if trying to stop an imaginary flow of urine. Repeat and increase reps over time as muscles become stronger. Use of a Kegel exerciser such as the Energie (Natural Contours) can increase effectiveness.
- Use curved toys or curved fingers. Try a toy with a broad blunt head such as the Galaxy G (Vixen Creations) or Danni's E-glass Wand (Topco). Light touch won't do much, but try a variety of rhythms and pressures. Clitoral stimulation can raise the pitch of arousal and make the G more responsive.
- Urinate before launching G exploration. If the need to urinate increases as orgasm approaches, give in, relax, and go with the flow.
- Position the partner. Fingers are more effective than the penis at reaching the G-spot. Curved dildos are great, but if working with the real thing, utilize sex positions that raise the receptive woman's body and optimize the angle of penetration.
- Take the backdoor. The perineum is thin and flexible, allowing sensations from anal play to penetrate the G-spot. As with all anal play, use lube, keep toy edges smooth, and make sure all toys have a wide enough base to prevent them from slipping inside.
- Try a vibe. While some women experience orgasms from G-spot stimulation through penetration alone, many women need external clitoral stimulation in order to orgasm.
A word of advice
Knowledge is the key to successfully selling, and informed customers are happy customers.
"Folks selling G-spot toys should educate themselves about the G-spot so they can help customers make a good choice. We've found at Babeland and the GspotCenter.com that if you know what you're talking about and offer information that enhances product use, people will trust you and be happier with their experience in your shop and more likely to return," says Venning.
"First, get the staff up to speed," says Dr. Queen, "People are confused about this and have questions. Don't do your staff and customers the disservice of blowing off the questions or expecting all entry-level staffers to have the answers. Have staff read or watch good G-spot books and videos. Solicit customer testimonials. Share preferences and experiences with each other (if that's appropriate in your environment). Invite trainers in to lecture at your store."
"You can up-sell with good books and videos or create a tip sheet of your own for customers," advises Cory Silverberg, Founder of Come As You Are and the Sexuality Guide at About.com. "You can also offer condoms and lube at the point of sale."
All things considered
What makes a good G-spotter? Here's a look at a few key qualities:
Curve: There are a number of toys on the market curved to reach comfortably behind the public bone. Beware of toys with short handles and small curves: They probably don't offer enough leverage to reach the spot.
Pressure and Pliability: Harder materials, like acrylic, glass, and stainless steel, exert firmer pressure on the G. Flexible, yet firm, materials, such as silicone, offer more leeway and can be more comfortable. "Flexible toys are preferable for partner use-especially if you're working with a partner who may not know your body's internal curves as well as you do," says Tantus creator Metis Black.
Caution: Avoid floppy G-spotters. Too many curved rubber toys on the market offer little resistance and will unbend in the vagina or anus and miss the spot.
Tip: Broader tips provide more even, blanketed pressure on the area. Many women find pointy toys or fingers irritating.
Size: As with any insertable, the width is more important than the length, because you can control the depth of penetration. "Many dildos and wands are 6 or 8 inches long with a curved tip. But, the G-spot is only a couple of inches inside, so if someone inserts the toy all the way in, they are going to miss their target," says Venning.
Toying with the G
Wands and Dildos
Most women cannot reach their own G-spot without the assistance of a curved toy. Wands tend to be made of firm, non-pliable glass, acrylic, or metal.
The easy-to-handle, stainless steel Pure Wand (njoy) has two rounded heads on a smooth C-curve for easy rocking. Some straight wands, like the metal Betty's Barbell (Betty Dodson), require a torque of the wrist and are better for customers who know where to target stimulation. S-shaped wands, like the borosilicate glass Marbled S Curve (Phallix), give a hands-free option.
Firm, pliable silicone dildos with large heads can be good G-spotters-whether used by hand or in a harness. Curved dildos with realistic heads, like the Johnny (Vixen Creations), can cause a catch-and-drag motion on the G during thrusting.
Some wands have handles for an easier grip. The platinum silicone Gforce (Tantus) "has a long handle, so you don't have to be a contortionist to use it for solo play," says Black.
Vibes
The G-spot is not sensitive to vibration or subtle stimulation of the vaginal wall; the nerve endings instead respond to firm repetitive pressure. However, many women find the combination of clitoral and G-spot stimulation necessary.
Retailers report higher sales in G-spot vibrators than in non-vibrating toys.
Cal Exotics offers a number of G vibes that make an excellent starting point-the star of the show being the Crystalessence Chubby G, an inexpensive battery vibe that sports an exemplary form: short, blunt-ended curve and a T-base.
If you can upgrade your computer, why not your vibrator? The pliable silicone G-Whiz (Vixen) is a cap with a 4-inch curved dildo that slides over the powerful Hitachi Magic Wand. Users get strong clit stimulation, nice handle leverage, a sweet curve, and an anal-safe insertable.
Fun Factory offers G-spot vibes in fabulously colored hygienic silicone. They have partnered with Good Vibrations to create the G-Swirl and G-Twist.
"Many of our customers end up using their G-spot vibes without the batteries, but the purchase gives them more sensations to experiment with and thus more knowledge about their bodies," notes Silverberg.
Vibratex has been at the forefront delivering multi-functional toys that swivel, twist and sweep the G, says company Shay Martin, company president.
"A sweeping pressure is a plus. If the toy does that action for you, that's even better than having to do it yourself," she says.
Last Words
The adult industry is positioned to play a unique role in advancing women's pleasure by offering more accurate information about the G-spot. Adult retailers may not see themselves as sex educators, but for some customers, a visit to their local or online sex toy retailer may be an informative experience, and customers equipped with useful facts and quality products are likely to come back.
Laura Weide is a sexuality writer, educator, and marketing maven who currently runs her own communications company, Spark Action. She has taught innumerable workshops on the G-spot and other aspects of sexual anatomy in the US and Europe and has screened her clip-show presentations Lesbian Porn 101 and Women Watch Porn at film festivals and venues around the world. You can reach her at [email protected].