It's hard to imagine any sex-toy retailer these days who doesn't understand the importance of improving the customer experience through improved customer service. Just as shoe retailers need to familiarize themselves with the basic workings of the feet, sex-toy retailers-at least those who want to thrive-need to have a basic understanding
of sexuality and sex education. This article won't tell you everything you need to know, but it offers a few ideas and resources to learn more on your own.
Marketing vs. Education
I am not a fan of retailers who refer to their staff members as sex educators. The primary purpose of your store and your staff is to sell products. This is marketing, not education. By calling yourselves educators, you can alienate the actual sex-education professionals in your community, and you risk making false promises to your customers. Instead of educators, think of your staff and your store as expert resources, a place where your customers can find information about a wide range of sexuality issues, including, of course, sex products.
Sexual Health vs. Sexual Pleasure
With so much information about sexuality available, it's helpful to break it down for yourself, your staff and your customers. Most information about sex falls into one of two categories: sexual health and sexual pleasure. Of course, these concepts are 100 percent related, but for the sake of finding information and providing information to your staff and customers, consider this breakdown:
- Information about sexual pleasure might include sexual improvement (such as better orgasms and lasting longer), tips and techniques (sex positions and how-tos), sexual communication, sex toys and porn (what they are and how to use them), socializing (where and how to meet people) and alternative relationships (such as swinging and polyamory).
- Information about sexual health might include sexually transmitted infections such as HIV, contraception and birth control, sexual dysfunctions (such as premature ejaculation and vaginismus), sex across the lifespan (such as puberty, menstruation and menopause), sexual medicine (drugs that hurt or improve sexual function), and sexual harassment and assault.
- With these categories in mind, any good sex shop should do a little work to have some resources available on at least a few topics in each category. Start with the topics your staff members get the most questions about. Resources might include printed pamphlets, web addresses you can write on the backs of business cards and give to customers who ask, or information that your staff is trained on and can communicate to customers.
What Follow are some organizations and websites you can use to find such resources or professionals who can help you train your staff.
Organizations
American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists
If you're looking for someone to train your staff on sexuality, I recommend seeking out a certified sex educator. This site lists all the AASECT-certified educators and sex therapists in North America.
Planned Parenthood
Federation of America
Planned Parenthood provides sexual-health service, information, education and advocacy. If you're interested in offering your customers or staff better information, get in touch with a Planned Parenthood clinic near your store.
Sex Information and Education Council of the United States
This website features information about sexuality education in the United States.
Websites
About Sexuality
This is my website, which offers articles on all aspects of sexuality, including a detailed section on sex toys.
American Social Health Association
Founded in 1914, this nonprofit organization offers easy-to-understand and up-to-date information on sexually transmitted diseases and is less technical and more user-friendly than the website of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. You can order printed educational pamphlets from the ASHA website.
American Sexuality Magazine
This free online publication from the National Sexuality Resource Center covers a range of sexual topics, including sexual pleasure, health, law, politics and entertainment, all from a critical, sex-positive perspective.
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention: Sexually Transmitted Diseases
Part of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, the CDC is the place to go for the official government line on all matters related to sexually transmitted infections, including symptoms, causes, prevention and treatment. Most content can be printed and given to customers and staff.
International Foundation for Gender Education
IFGE advocates freedom of gender expression, and this site is a good place to start any search for information related to gender issues, including supporting staff members and customers who identify as themselves as transgender or transsexual.
San Francisco Sex Information
This is the website of the famed sex-information line in San Francisco. Check out the resource page for links to other great sexuality resources.
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Cory Silverberg is an AASECT-certified sexuality educator and a co-owner of Come As You Are. He also is the sexuality guide for About.com and a co-author of The Ultimate Guide to Sex and Disability (Cleis Press, 2007).
