NEW YORK CITY—Author and “alternative life coach” Bo Blaze has launched a new column for the popular RomanceBeat.com blog, giving readers some spicy lovemaking tips in advance of the Valentine’s Day premier of the Fifty Shades of Grey movie.
Blaze, the author of 50 Shades of Curious: BDSM for Beginners and a PCC certified alternative lifestyle coach specializing in kink, BDSM and polyamory, offers a quick course in BDSM in his first column for the blog that “takes the pulse of romance” in pop culture.
“At its heart BDSM is about connecting with your partner on a very deep and intimate level,” said Blaze. “To make oneself vulnerable, to trust, to open up and admit to things that we may have thought we’d never share with anyone. It’s about the integrity to live up to that trust and vulnerability and to explore your sexuality together with someone special.”
“To be clear, BDSM can be dangerous and you should be aware of the risks," he cautioned. "You need to educate yourself before you play.” (He refers readers to his Kinky Reading List, which has both educational and fiction book recommendations.) “It’s important to realize that Fifty Shades of Grey is a kinky romance novel and not real life. However, while it shouldn't be used as a manual on safely integrating kink into your sex life, it does give some really fun ideas for a hot night in the bedroom, let alone a Red Room of Pain.”
Here’s a sample of his top 10 favorite kinky lovemaking tips inspired by FSOG.
#1: Give them a spanking: Spanking is probably the most common activity that people start with. There is just something very exciting about being pulled over your lover’s lap and having them spank you for being a bad girl/boy. The helplessness, the squirming, the memories of childhood both good and bad.”
#2: “Sign a sexy agreement. Ana and Christian signed one and many people who practice BDSM create contracts together. Of course these are not legally binding, but they can be wonderfully ceremonial and maybe more importantly, clarify what partners are or are not interested in doing. Agree on a fantasy that you’ve negotiated together and then write out a detailed description of what you will do with each other. Choose a date and time this will happen and then sign it. This will create sexy anticipation between the two of you and it can be a lot of fun to secretly remind your partner of your upcoming tryst with a whisper in their ear.”
For more information on Blaze, click here.
