Pope Benedict to Infertile Couples: Can't Conceive? Tough!

THE VATICAN—Not only does the Catholic Church prohibit the use of birth control—which most practicing Catholics use anyway—but it also forbids fertility treatments. Pope Benedict XVI said Saturday that infertile couples must rely on the act of sexual intercourse as the "only acceptable" method of conception allowed by the Church. The proclamation was a direct attack on artificial insemination, even for people who are unable to conceive naturally. 

"The human and Christian dignity of procreation, in fact, doesn't consist in a 'product', but in its link to the conjugal act, an expression of the love of the spouses of their union, not only biological but also spiritual," said the Pontiff.

Telling the tempted to resist "the fascination of the technology of artificial fertility," he warned against "easy income, or even worse, the arrogance of taking the place of the Creator," by which he seemed to be targeting the entire field of artificial procreation.

Thus does the Church dignify its millions of members worldwide, by prohibiting them from exerting any independent control over some of the most important facets of their lives: the decisions related to having offspring.

Despite the blanket prohibitions, the Pope encouraged medical research into infertility, but toward what end he did not say. Indeed, if one is prohibited from acting on the knowledge gained in such research, what precisely would be the point?

The Catholic Church is not exactly an institution steeped in intellectual curiosity or inquiry. Its collective mind is preordained to think a certain way, and admitting an ecclesiastical mistake takes centuries, if it's allowed at all. Now, in the face of a global rebellion among its followers over teachings that interfere with their ability to improve their lives, the Church is doubling down.

If God has made you infertile, you are out of luck no matter what miracles of science—resulting from human ingenuity—offer alternative ways for you to make a real and natural baby. You have to keep fucking even though the act will never result in a baby.

That's actually kind of ironic, considering the church only approves of copulation for the purpose of procreation. With no hope of procreating, infertile couples are being told to continue fucking. Does that mean the church is promoting sex as an end in itself, or is it willing itself to believe a miracle can overcome the infertility? Why not just tell infertile people that God did not intend them to have children and leave it at that? Actually, the church is doing both: telling people they're fucked but to hold out hope anyway.

This seems like an odd move if you're trying to attract more followers and not alienate the masses, but then again it's unlikely people will be excommunicated for using artificial insemination. Still, are the children who result from these "arrogant" acts real children, despite not being conceived through fucking? Can they go to heaven? If they can, then why aren't infertile couples being encouraged to use alternative methods to conceive? The birth is natural. The child can go to heaven. What's the problem?

These are rhetorical questions. The problem is obvious. The problem is the church. Looking at these issues from the vantage point of Porn Valley, it seems as if the whole world has madder than normal. The more people just want to be left alone, the more other people want to force them to either wear a condom or not wear one. From the secular to the religious, the message is the same: Obey or be fucked.