Porn Nazis Forced to Shred, Not Burn

DURHAM, N.H.—This would never have happened in Nazi Germany! The krauts knew how to dispose of “liberals” before they had a chance to pass environmental laws. Not so in the good old U. S. of A., where a pesky law making it illegal in Durham, New Hampshire, to burn household goods in a bonfire-type setting has upset the best mislaid plans of a group of UNH students.

The group that “planned to burn what they consider pornography Thursday on the Great Lawn will have to shred the materials instead. The magazines they consider pornography—and plan to destroy—include Sports Illustrated and Cosmopolitan,” reported SeaCoastOnline.com.

The Womyn's Club, an unrecognized student organization apparently with only 15 members in dire need of a remedial spelling course, was initially issued a permit by the Durham Fire Department but it had to be rescinded after someone realized it should never have been issued in the first place.

"This was a mistake," said Durham Fire Chief Corey Landry. “It just slipped by, but we caught it and we had to correct it.”

Imagine what would have happened if Germany's national socialists had faced such hurdles before their big book burnings in 1933!

Now the group will have to shred the offending material, which the website says they have been collecting from around the local community. In addition to “porn” magazines, they’ve gathered porn videos, but will not purchase any to destroy because they don’t want to support the industry.

Being fledgling neo-Nazis raised on the teat of neo-progressive ideals they have not yet learned to despise, they also care about the environment.

“It was frustrating,” said event organizer Kam Jamison, a UNH senior women's studies major, referring to the rescinded permit, “but it's fine because we care about the environment, too.”

That said, “The group will still build an ‘equity fire’ to raise awareness about pornography from noon to 3 p.m., but will dispose of the materials with two paper shredders located next to the fire instead of throwing the items in. The shredded paper will be recycled and possibly turned into papier-mâché.”

What a creative way to “destroy any piece of literature that relates to or portrays sexual domination, misogyny or racism,” which is one of the group’s goals. Maybe next semester they can get credit for it: The Art of Censorship 101. Or maybe it's a social studies course, with a focus on the family.

"We want to revive the anti-porn movement because we care about women and children," Jamison said. "This is a huge invisible issue that we want to make visible."

It sounds like they want to revive something else, too.