To the current generation, Playboy's been around for a millennium if it's been around for a year.  What was life like before Playmates?  It's almost unimaginable.  We're tickled to death that they're still finding steady work as American icons.  The quintessential playmate - the everyman's fantasy - must surely be the "girl next door," here captured in all their creamy-skinned, bobby-socked glory in seven deliciously campy scenarios.

The highlights include a study date, in which some very trusting parents heave their plaid-skirted little darling alone to hit the books with the captain of the football team.  Before you can say "Debbie Does..." well, you know the rest.  A new spin on Romeo and Juliet pits two rival restaurants against each other, but the waitress and waiter from either eatery decide to make new inroads in the service-oriented industry by making after-hours love in the kitchen.  (Juliet is a particularly striking, petite brunette.)

On the high-tech side, a virtual babe materializes for a horny hacker, while the lowest-tech sequence features the grand old outdoors and two farm-fresh skinny dippers.  Hitchcock fans will take special delight in a Rear Window inspired setting wherein a camera buff snaps candid pix of his randy, redheaded neighbor across the courtyard - who also turns out to be the gal who develops his negatives at the local photo shop!

When padded out into hardcore features, these frivolous sorts of scenarios come across as hopelessly juvenile.  As Playboy featurettes, they simply appeal to the horny adolescent in every grown man hankerin' for the girl next door.