Some amateur releases actually bother to diddle around with preconceived scenarios. Rarely do they seem as contrived as the ones in MILF Pick-Ups. Slavishly imitative of a genre best left to professionals – or even better, left on the friggin? cutting-room floor – this entry is to amateur fare what robotic is to artificial intelligence.

Rather than concentrating on sincere encounters between real exhibitionists, it seems the makers prefer dicking around with phony expository while "picking up" their silicone-pumped targets (Read: unemployed strippers). Once the unimpressive cockslingers get them in the studio, dull action commences on both an exercise ball and sex swing.

An Asian lady is the least pretentious; possibly worth a look by ethnic-oriented fans.

Retailing: MILF/amateur/Asian filler.