Tripp Daniels is wrong. The Real Cancun is a masterpiece.
Tripp, you ignorant slut. Your facile dismissal of The Real Cancun highlights both your lack of knowledge of the history of filmmaking and your lack of worth as a man.
Bunim and Murray's look at the wild party-people who party-down at the non-stop party that is Spring Break in Cancun is rad, extreme, and totally in your face. You, Tripp, are not extreme, nor are you in anyone's face. Couch your jealousy in concern for "creative development teams" if you must, but I know the truth... I hear you over the cubicle wall, muttering to yourself about your own long-gone youth; I see you in your worn out Izod shirts, pretending to a station you can never attain. You are a pathetic, half-man, wandering this earth forever advertising your own failure to those who can't look away fast enough. You, Tripp Daniels, who would deny America The Real Cancun and the just-past-teenage broads shouting, "woo!" and lifting their shirts that it will bring, are like a pestilence upon this nation.
Don't try to tell me that the idea of glamorizing a bunch of over-privileged college kids vomiting warm Zima and Rohypnol on the bones of the Mexican people concerns you, either, Tripp. I know you were so totally for the Iraq war.
Anyway, it's an important film. The Real Cancun is the latest link in the chain of feature length documentaries that began in the early 1920s with Robert Flaherty's seminal Nanook of the North. Nanook tells the story of an Inuit Eskimo as he hunts, fishes, trades and migrates. Although it's generally regarded as one of the most important ethnographic films ever made, Nanook of the North is actually pretty sucky when you compare it to The Real Cancun. I mean, it's all silent, and black and white, and it's, like, totally boring and old, and the only people who like movies like that are a bunch of boring old assholes who are all, like, "Oh, look at me... I'm so smart." (NOTE: In case you didn't get it, I'm talking about YOU, Tripp Daniels.)
Only Tripp Daniels would want to watch a movie about some dead Eskimo eating blubber instead of the Spring Break adventures of the 16 hunky guys and sexy gals who make up the cast of The Real Cancun. I hear from their P.R. Department that these kids really put the "Can" in Cancun (if you know what I mean!) According to The Real Cancun's website, the cast members include Nicole, a 20 year old public relations major from New Mexico whose favorite movie is Dumb and Dumber and Matt, whose favorite book is Charlotte's Web and whose best quote is "Win or Lose, Drink some Booze." You can't see why the people who brought us The Real World would choose to devote a film to these people? Which are you, Tripp, stupid or gay?
I guess you'd rather watch one of those documentaries made by Michael Moore, who's all fat and talky and has all these ideas about, like, guns and stuff, I guess. Or maybe you'd rather stay in your house and write your little "Trippin' Out" column where you say stuff like, "Oh, I'm so smart and I hate The Real Cancun because it's got cool clothes in it and I don't like any movies except for boring ones for jerks."
In summation: Tripp Daniels, you are a dumb asshole.
To write to Mr. Ochs, please click here. Stephen Ochs.
