CHICAGO—It's been pretty cold in the Windy City this year, but sex journalist/blogger Rachel Rabbit White has come up with a way to take the edge off the freeze: Watch porn and masturbate—and do it today, Lady Porn Day.
On her blog, RabbitWrite.com, White recounts her first contact with porn: A 1997 issue of Playboy discovered by White, her sister and friend Lilly during a search of her (male) cousin's room—and of course, they had to look through it since it might contain a nude picture of their then-idol, Spice Girl Ginger Spice.
"We turned each page slowly at the pink nipples and tan lines," White writes somewhat cryptically. "It didn’t feel dirty, until afterward. Naked women were these otherworldly creatures like unicorns or mermaids. It was something of beauty and mystery and power. And yet as a kid, I knew porn was something dirty and bad."
That didn't stop her from putting her Barbies in sexual positions, or watching soft porn vids like Reform School Girls, but it did keep her from enjoying her early sexual experiences as much as she otherwise might have.
"Finally, in college I decided to explore porn on my own and I had to confront those bad feelings," she recounts. "Because I could find porn that got me off … but moments after the air was pierced with the sound of my orgasm, I was faced with this inward attack, this bad dirty feeling."
Fortunately, she got over it because, as she told Huffington Post, "a few years ago, I realized I wanted to be more comfortable with porn than I was. I wanted to be the cool, sex positive girlfriend you could share porn with. Instead, I felt guilty after watching porn, or jealous when my partner watched. So, I explored these issues, explored just what made me feel icky and what I was told about porn growing up. In doing this, I also allowed myself to find porn I actually liked."
"Girls aren't encouraged to talk to each other about porn—the same way we aren't encouraged to talk to each other about masturbation," White wrote on her own blog. "In girl-world, too often we expect our first orgasm to come from a partner. Then we expect our Sex-and-The-City approved hitachi-orgasms to come from, well, our closed eyes. But porn is just another tool for your sexual growth. And according to statistics more women are watching porn than ever, growing stronger in our silence apparently."
From there, it was only a short step to encouraging other women to hold forth on the porn they liked, and so was born Lady Porn Week, celebrated this year Feb. 21-26, of which Feb. 22 is the focal point: Lady Porn Day.
"At it’s [sic] heart, this is about celebrating pornography and masturbation," White writes. "It is an opportunity for ladies of all genders (or however you identify) to open up a dialog: What is feminist porn? What is your history with porn? What do you find hot?"
"And ultimately it’s a dare to share your hot links," she continues. "Because the more we can openly talk about porn and what we like, the more likely it is that porn for women will continue being made. And really, guys have been sharing and recommending porn for ages! So help a sister out."
And as one might guess, dozens if not hundreds have.
For instance, there's the world-famous British sex-positive activist Betty Dobson who sex-positively dialogues with Carlin Ross in a specially made video. There's also porn stars Jiz Lee ("Consider [her] your new porn crush. Or mine.") and Miss Maggie Mayhem, plus educator/reviewer/blogger Jamye Waxman, and plenty of other lesser-known names. White also lists (and links to) her "Jilling Off Hall of Fame"—she's a big fan of ifeelmyself.com, and we can certainly understand why—and lists "Allies," "Press" and a lot of posters commemorating the day.
So if you're a woman and you own your sexuality, today's the day to "get down with your bad self" and have a little masturbatory fun—and write about it!
