It's the "Miss (W)Hole Package" contest, combining last year's "Miss Slit" and "Miss Pucker" contests into a single competition. Kind of like what the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences did with the Black-and-White and Color Cinematography categories in 1967. Last year's Miss Slit (Jill Kelly) and Miss Pucker (Tiffany Mynx) are back to win the new title, but 16 other contenders are trying to put them in the history books.

Writer/director Jim Holliday pulls out every beauty-contest cliché in the book in this two-hour-plus exercise, including contestants fucking the emcee, contestants fucking the judges, contestants fucking the pageant owner, and contestants fucking each other (with the added twist of them doing it on stage as part of the evaluation of the body parts under consideration). Jill Kelly is appropriately gorgeous, and shines in her scene with Devin Wolf and particularly in a sunlit g/g on a blanket on a grassy hill overlooking the ocean with Tiffany Mynx. Kelsey Heart is very funny as, like, a Val, y'know? F'r'shure! (Here's a scary thought: Heart is probably younger than Moon Unit Zappa.) Julian and Evan Stone are also very good as a judge and the emcee, and the interview scenes where the judges (led by Ron Jeremy) grill the girls on what they'd like to do if they win provide some laughs.

Speaking of history books, many of the contestant names have a ring of familiarity to them, as befits a script by the self-anointed Historian Of Porn.

Nine sex scenes, not counting the 16-girl evaluation orgy near the end. Tech credits okay: The way-bright lighting says "sitcom" more than "sexvid," but you don't miss anything.